Dis-integration

Two years ago I arrived in Tanzania, and since then I've been making friends, learning language, eating new foods, adopting new behavior..... "integration," in a word.  And it's not over.  I still find myself trying to increase my vocabulary, deepen friendships, and better understand the culture here.  I'm not quite ready to leave; I like my life here and it's hard to let go.  But the day is coming.  A month from today I will sign some papers in Dar Es Salaam and I will no longer be a Peace Corps volunteer.  So even as I deepen my relationship with this place, I find myself beginning to pull up my roots. 

My life on Pemba is beginning to unravel; little pieces seem to be breaking off and dissolving.  One day a few books disappear from my shelf, the next some clothes are given away, and eventually I'll have to give in and start taking down the maps, pictures, and cards that have been hanging on my walls.  A third of my students left my school last month to take their exit examinations.  My lessons with them already seem to be a distant memory.  Another third of my students are having their last day at school today, leaving me with only a few students and a handfull of lessons to teach over the next few weeks.  It seems there will be no explicit, this-is-goodbye moment at my school; rather my participation there is fading away.

Goodbyes are happening at the same slow, steady pace.  For the last month, each time I've met up with another volunteer, it's ended with "see you.... someday.... maybe!"  Likewise, farewells to my Pemban friends are already beginning.  I had a few free days last week, so I went to Unguja (the bigger island) to see some friends who are studying there.  I'm starting to compile full names, addresses, and phone numbers in an address book.  Who knows when I'll be back, but whether it's 5 years or 15, I'll want to be able to track down old friends. 

I'm feeling resistance towards leaving, but I think as the next few weeks pass, the process will snowball.  Hopefully I'll fall in with that acceleration, and when the day comes, it will feel like the right time to go.

VSO friends Annelies, Sarah, and Juanito.  Sarah and Juanito recently finished their volunteer projects on Pemba.  Juanito lived on Pemba for over 3 years, and was one of the first people to welcome me when I arrived.

In May I went to a close of service conference in Dar.  It was a reunion of all the volunteers who came to Tanzania in June 2011.  Tyler, Marielle, Brie, and Becca were my neighbors and language classmates for the first 3 months in country.

The staff of my school at last month's graduation.

Hassan on his graduation day.  He was one of my best students and is an all around positive and friendly guy.  I'll miss him.

One of my English classes on their last day of school.

On the right is Mchanga, my neighbors' daughter.  She's a nursing student on Unguja.  I was lucky enough to have free time to go visit her before I leave.

Mussa and Khamis, two of the original members of my community English club.